While there is no shortage of song lyrics offering advice on how to find love, it does not always seem as easy as those soulful singers make it out to be. Do you really think they have ever had to sit through a humiliating blind date, be a third wheel, or listen to well meaning friends tell them this will be your year to fall in love at yet another New Years party? Probably not.
It is probably a lot easier to find love when you have a hit record and a mansion in the hills.
So, what about the rest of us? How do we find love in the everyday world? That is the million dollar question that keeps the relationship advice columnists employed year after year. While there is no one proven method to find love, there are some simple things you can do to up your chances.
1) You are more likely to find love with someone who shares your beliefs, so why not start looking at the places where you practice them? Church or temple can be a great place to meet potential romantic interests. If the other person attends regularly, he or she has already shown the ability to make a commitment to something they believe is important. This can be a really great sign if you are the type of person who believes that true love is based on faith and commitment.
2) If church is not really your thing, then you can still make a point to frequent places that would attract people with interests similar to yours. If you are outdoorsy, for example, join a hiking or climbing club. If you find love on a nature hike, it will not be all that far to go to yell it from the mountaintops. (Warning, if you are really not outdoorsy, this is not the place to look for true love. You are likely to end up with an annoyed group leader who has to carry you and your bandaged ankle back to base camp.)
3) Sometimes you can get so carried away trying to find love that you can sort of forget to enjoy other aspects of your life. Do not forget to try new things, even those that have nothing to do with a romantic dinner for two. Take a fitness class or learn a language. Just make sure it is something that gets you socializing with other people. While the goal is not to find love at the local community college, it could happen.
4) Be willing to occasionally take your friends relationship advice. Yeah, it can be painful, and sometimes they are dead wrong; but there are plenty of people who give credit for their marriage to a mutual friend and a blind date.
5) While it sounds completely trite, remember that true love starts with you. The more comfortable you are spending time with you, the more comfortable other people will be doing the same. In fact, each of the previous suggestions leads directly to this one. Fulfilling yourself spiritually, enjoying your hobbies, learning new things, and taking risks are all ways that you can develop your own potential. It is so much easier to find love with someone else after you have found it with yourself.
Caterina Christakos is the author of the dating book The Seduction Game for Women. To learn more about how to find a compatible, stimulating, romantic relationship that actually lasts go to: seductiondiva.com